I had a conversation with Cynthia about my back pain and yoga, and I started talking about Kundalini. I have been observing the changes throughout the years and this seem like a good time to do a little story of my understanding of Kundalini and my own experience. I knew of Kundalini and Chakra, but I didn’t know what it is nor look into it, not until it was told to me.
Let’s start with my back pain, I believe it started around 2003 or 2004 when I was in my early 20’s. Out of no where, my lower back, the point where it meets my tail bone, was in so much pain. It was very painful to stand for a long time, drive, or do anything; throbbing heat pain. At the time I linked it to my childhood car accident when I got hit by a car and my left leg was broken in two places.
Fast forward to 2007. Matthew suggested that we go to Cassadaga, Florida to go see a medium/psychic. I did not know what I was getting into, I did study astrology and have had psychic readings, but not to the extent of what I was about to experience. What you do when you get to Cassadaga is you go into the welcoming center, look at the medium available for the day and pick the one that your intuition tells you to pick. So I picked this one guy because I like his name and Matthew called the guy to see if he likes him too. It turn out his sun sign and ascendant sign are both is Pisces, so Matthew said ok, he’s the one. The medium started of with telling a bit of a story about himself and what he does, he said he’s not a psychic, but what he does is communicate with the spirit guide. He said he was able to communicate with animal, especially wolf since he was young, but he didn’t realize he was different until he got older. He’d also mentioned that he has a Native Indian American lineage. Anyhow, he did a chakra energy reading on Matthew and I, and after that he asked me if I know what Kundalini is. I said I know of it. Then he explained to me that I am going through a Kundalini awakening process, and I should read about it. He told me that my views of the word and perspectives are about to go through a major change, my reality will not be the same. He told me about some book to read, I don’t remember what it is because I didn’t bother to write it down. At the time I thought this was all weird and crazy, I was thinking is this guy fucking with me. He told me that I would probably understand that book, where he himself wouldn’t understand. He explained that the kundalini first start in the root chakra, and when this happens it will have a physical manifestation, some people will gain a lot of weight around their waist or buttock area, or in my case back pain. That was the first time I start to link my spine physical pain to Kundalini awakening.
At the end he told me to have three questions I want to ask my spirit guide, but don’t tell him, just keep them in my mind. My questions and answers I received from him were:
- Question: Should I keep working with my parents? Answer: You will be happy whether you choose to keep working with your parents or not.
- Question: Am I suppose to spend my life with Matthew? (Because at the time it was very confusing) Answer: It’s destiny that you two meet.
- Question: Am I on the right path? Answer: Not to worry, you are being guided.
This was around the time I started Yoga. My mom was dealing with a really bad C4 and C5 spinal problem, it was degenerating, and her medical option was surgery. However, she refused to go that route and wanted to try Yoga first. So I checked it out with her. Knowing what Yoga does, and how it also involves with Kundalini and Chakra, I did attempt to get into it. It took me many try to start enjoying it and having Yoga becomes a part of my life.
Some time in 2007, after the visit to Cassadaga, I was walking in our apartment neighborhood with Matthew in Tampa, FL, Camden Preserve, and I got to meet this black lady that Matthew had been chit chatting with. She handed me two books to read, “Kundalini” and “Cosmic Consciousness.” Looking back, her energy was warm and loving, with a sense of wisdom and gratitude. She seems to know what was going on with me, and she wished me well travel. I still have not read that book Kundalini, nor have I finish Cosmic Consciousness. I really need to read Cosmic Consciousness again, I believe now is the time.
Around 2007 or 2008, Kimberly M gave me a book called “Celestine Prophecy”. That book became a major part of my spiritual growth. Here is a book from someone who is telling me what I have been experience all of my life, my inner knowing since childhood is real. It was helpful to have someone put everything into words in a book for me, to help confirm with me that my sense of energy since childhood is real, it’s not just in my head. My childhood sense of synchronicity, God, Universe is real. His book help me to understand certain things that I do not yet know at the time, and to prepare myself for what is to come.
My back pain slowly moved up through my spine to the upper back area over the years, then to my neck in recent years. It’s very painful, I had very low movability. I believe it was around 2008 or 2009 that Matthew introduced Bikram Yoga to me, I loved it. It helped me tremendously and it has become a major part of my life.
Something major happened in June, 2012 when I believed my heart chakra started opening up. I was with Matthew and Dena during the day, we were going to Tiffani and Macaviti’s performance when it started happening. I started feeling my heart breathing and I was feeling pulses of energy exploding from my heart to the rest of my body. When it was happening, I could feel Dena’s true emotions, I could feel her thoughts. That evening when I was trying to go to sleep, I thought to myself I might never wake up again as the feeling would not stop, I wasn’t sure if it was a medical condition or has to do with my awakening process. That sensation repeated itself several times that year. After several months, I could start feeling energy moving up and down between my throat chakra to my heart chakra. However, I believe the energy was moving up and down all the way to my root chakra as I experience orgasm sensation from time to time.
In 2013, my ability with energy increased tremendously. I could feel it in other people, I could move it. In June, I started to notice that I could see energy. I could see it better at night, but I could see them coming out from trees, people., and in the air. At first I was wondering if I’m tripping, but the following has proved to me that I could:
- While at Origins in South Padre, Texas, I told people I’m energy sensitive. Looking back it was my spirit speaking. At this time it was when I met Dr. PV who told me I need to work on building up my energy shield. This was when I experienced the power of manifestation, the power of energy in dealing with people, and I became fully aware I could feel energy that people gives out.
- While at NOVA in Austin, Texas in March 2013, I met a sad and lost white girl at an Alcoholic Anonymous meeting. She came into the meeting late and was crying non stop. I had an intense inner desire to go sit next to her, I felt like I could do something for her. The inner desire is similar to an intense attraction toward someone. I told myself to stop thinking about it and second guessing myself and go sit next to her. I asked her if I could sit next to her, and she removed her purse from the chair so I could sit down. She was still crying, so I told her to hold my hand. While holding her hand, I started to feel her energy, I was sensing her true emotion and what was going on with her. I closed my eyes and pray, I prayed for God to remove the pain from her and give her strength, give her hope. After awhile she stopped crying. I then planted a thought in her head to share her story in the meeting before it is over, because I knew it would help her. She shared her story at the last minute.
- While in San Diego, CA in June 2013, I was able to make my room brighter when I was being surrounded by dark entities. This was also when I become aware that unseen entities were able to take my energy.
- A stranger sitting behind me in a buss in San Diego, CA said I’m an energy controller, energy manipulator in May 2013.
- Back at NOVA in June and July 2013, I become aware I could see energy in the air and coming out from trees. I notice I could move energy with my hands at night. After Jennier H-B at NOVA reintroduced crystals back into my life, I realize I could sense it’s energy and it’s property. I found out I could manipulate energy out of rocks and into my body, I could see it and I could feel it.
- While at NOVA in June and July 2013, I found out I could feel, mirror, and take in other people emotional/thought energy through touch. I held hands with Trish and Dena and I could feel what is going on with their chakras right inside of my own chakra. This was also when I erased my childhood doubt that I could read other people thoughts, I could pick them up telepathically and some time believe it’s my own. I started to learn to understand it and to control it.
- While at Nova in July 2013, I had my first experience communicating with a spirit by communicating with Joleen’s recent deceased friend. At first I was trying to help remove her sad emotions, pain, but it turned into something totally new to me.
- While at New Hope in Chicago in April 2013, a yoga instructor told me that I have healing energy after I told her that her energy is very powerful, I could feel it. She told me that I was healing people in the class, I just didn’t realize it. She told me she had Reiki training and suggest that I look into it.
- I took my first Reiki class in Austin, TX in August 201. The class allowed me to feel energy from people differently, I suppose more from a healing stand point. I had another experience with communicating with someone’s spirit guide/consciousness while practicing a reiki healing on my classmate. I picked up a message that her spirit want me to share with her. I told her” Your son or something wants you to know that you are a great mother, that your son loves her very much, don’t stop what you are doing. One day your son will tell you that he appreciates everything you are doing for him.” She told me that is something that most people don’t even know about her, and she told me I should keep investigating Reiki and energy.
- One night in August of 2013 in Austin, Texas, after hanging out with Michael T, I was seeing tremendous energy coming out of me. I felt unsafe that night, I felt my energy shield was low and I felt like some unseen entity was trying to take my energy.
- During a Crystal Healing Class with Adrienne Goff , I saw energy coming out of this lady feet during a healing demonstration done by Adrienne. Adrienne confirmed with me that she felt something around that lady feet as well, like it needs a lot of healing.
- I joined a Share Reiki session in April 2014 at Sarasota Reiki Circle run by Kelly Stewart. I sensed new energy sensation in relating to reiki and healing energy. I was mirroring the feeling of energy in my own chest while I had my hands over this lady chest, I analyzed the energy and it felt that she needed a lot of healing in that area. Then I could feel a resistance, a bubble, over her throat. She later confirmed that she has a reverse acid reflux.
I feel that my Third Eye chakra has been in the process of opening up, and one of the major point happened in May 2014. It had and intense pain in the front of my head and around the sides of my head. It was a pain sensation that I have never felt before. This year my neck pain and upper back pain has subsided tremendously, I could turn my head to the left fully again. I have also found out in December 2013 that I am now 6 feet 2 inches tall, that is an inch taller since I was 25 years old; I am now 32. It also seems to me when I choose not to have sex, and especially not masturbate, my energy and power increases. As they say, more shall be reveal.
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